Breaking up is one of the most emotionally challenging experiences anyone can go through. If you’re here, you’re probably searching for answers on how to make your ex miss you. Maybe you’re hoping to rekindle the flame, or perhaps you just want to leave a lasting impression that keeps them thinking about you. Whatever your reason, the good news is that there are proven, effective strategies to make your ex miss you like crazy. The key lies in a combination of self-improvement, subtle psychological tactics, and a dash of patience.
In this article, we’ll dive deep into actionable tips, real-life examples, and the do’s and don’ts of making your ex miss you. Whether you’re dealing with a recent breakup or trying to rekindle an old flame, these strategies are designed to help you stand out and leave your ex wondering what they’ve lost. Let’s get started!
Why Do You Want Your Ex to Miss You?
Before we jump into the how, let’s talk about the why. Understanding your motivation is crucial. Are you hoping to get back together? Do you want closure? Or are you simply looking to boost your confidence after a tough breakup?
I remember when my friend Sarah went through a breakup. She was devastated and kept asking, “How do I make him miss me?” But after some reflection, she realized she wasn’t just trying to win him back—she wanted to feel valued and appreciated. Once she shifted her focus to self-love and personal growth, everything changed. She started working out, picked up painting, and even traveled solo for the first time. Not only did she become a happier person, but her ex started noticing her transformation and eventually reached out to her.
So, take a moment to reflect on your goals. Are you trying to make your ex miss you for the right reasons? Or are you simply seeking validation? Understanding your “why” will help you approach this process with clarity and intention.
How to Make Your Ex Miss You: 8 Proven Strategies
1. Give Them Space (No, Really!)
One of the most effective ways to make your ex miss you is to give them space. This might sound counterintuitive, especially if you’re used to being in constant contact, but it works. When you stop texting, calling, or trying to “accidentally” bump into them, it creates a void. And guess what? Nature abhors a vacuum.
Real-Life Example:
My cousin Jake made the mistake of bombarding his ex with messages after their breakup. He’d text her every day, asking how she was doing and if she missed him. She eventually blocked him because it felt overwhelming. But when he finally stopped reaching out, she started wondering why he’d disappeared. A few weeks later, she reached out to him first, asking if he was okay. That small gesture opened the door for them to reconnect.
Do 😊: Focus on your own life during this time. Pick up a new hobby, spend time with friends, or dive into a passion project.
Don’t 🚫: Don’t stalk their social media or send passive-aggressive texts like, “I guess you don’t care about me anymore.”
2. Work on Yourself (The Glow-Up Strategy)
Nothing makes an ex miss you more than seeing you thrive without them. Use this time to focus on self-improvement. Hit the gym, pick up a new hobby, or finally take that cooking class you’ve been eyeing. When your ex sees that you’re doing well—and maybe even better than when you were together—they’ll start to wonder what they’re missing out on.
Real-Life Example:
After her breakup, my friend Emily decided to focus on her fitness goals. She started posting her progress on social media, not to show off but to document her journey. Her ex noticed and even commented on one of her posts, saying how proud he was of her. That small interaction led to them reconnecting and eventually getting back together.
Do 😊: Invest in your physical and mental well-being. Join a gym, start meditating, or take up a new skill like photography or dancing.
Don’t 🚫: Don’t fake your happiness—authenticity is key. If you’re not ready to post, don’t force it.
3. Be Mysterious (Less Is More)
When it comes to how to make your ex miss you, mystery is your best friend. Stop oversharing on social media or with mutual friends. Let them wonder what you’re up to. The less they know, the more they’ll think about you.
Real-Life Example:
I once dated someone who was always posting every detail of their life online. After we broke up, they suddenly went silent. I couldn’t help but wonder what they were doing—and it made me miss them more. Eventually, I reached out to them just to see how they were doing.
Do 😊: Keep your social media posts minimal and positive. A picture of you smiling with friends or enjoying a new hobby is enough to pique their curiosity.
Don’t 🚫: Don’t post sad quotes or cryptic messages like, “I guess some people never change.” It comes off as passive-aggressive and immature.
4. Reconnect on a Positive Note
If you’ve given them space and worked on yourself, it might be time to reconnect. But keep it light and positive. A simple “Hey, how have you been?” can go a long way. The goal is to remind them of the good times without bringing up the past.
Real-Life Example:
My friend Mark reconnected with his ex after a few months of no contact. Instead of bringing up the past, he kept the conversation casual and fun. They ended up meeting for coffee and are now back together.
Do 😊: Keep the conversation light and positive. Talk about shared interests or happy memories.
Don’t 🚫: Don’t bring up old arguments or blame them for the breakup. It will only push them further away.
5. Show Them What They’re Missing
This isn’t about rubbing your success in their face—it’s about subtly reminding them of the amazing person they let go. Whether it’s your sense of humor, your kindness, or your adventurous spirit, let those qualities shine.
Real-Life Example:
After her breakup, my sister started volunteering at an animal shelter. Her ex always admired her compassion, and when he saw her posts about it, he reached out to compliment her. That small gesture led to them reconnecting and eventually getting back together.
Do 😊: Focus on the qualities they loved about you. If they admired your creativity, start a new art project. If they loved your sense of humor, share funny stories with friends.
Don’t 🚫: Don’t try to be someone you’re not. Authenticity is key.
6. Be Kind and Gracious
Nothing makes an ex miss you more than seeing how well you’re handling the breakup. Be kind, gracious, and mature—even if they weren’t.
Real-Life Example:
When my coworker broke up with her boyfriend, she sent him a heartfelt message thanking him for the good times and wishing him the best. He was so touched that he reached out a few weeks later to apologize for his behavior.
Do 😊: Be polite and respectful, even if they weren’t. It shows emotional maturity and strength.
Don’t 🚫: Don’t badmouth them to mutual friends. It will only make you look bitter.
7. Create New Memories Without Them
One of the best ways to make your ex miss you is to show them that your life doesn’t revolve around them. Travel, try new things, and create memories that don’t include them.
Real-Life Example:
After his breakup, my friend Alex booked a solo trip to Europe. His ex saw his photos and realized how much fun he was having without her. She later admitted that it made her miss him more.
Do 😊: Step out of your comfort zone and try new things. Take a class, join a club, or plan a trip.
Don’t 🚫: Don’t do things just to make them jealous. It’s transparent and often backfires.
8. Be Patient (Timing Is Everything)
Finally, remember that making your ex miss you takes time. Don’t rush the process or try to force things. Let things unfold naturally.
Real-Life Example:
I once tried to rush into reconnecting with an ex, and it only pushed them further away. When I finally let go and focused on myself, they came back on their own.
Do 😊: Trust the process and be patient. Focus on your own happiness in the meantime.
Don’t 🚫: Don’t obsess over their every move. It will only make you more anxious.
Final Thoughts: How to Make Your Ex Miss You Like Crazy
Learning how to make your ex miss you isn’t about playing games or manipulating their emotions. It’s about becoming the best version of yourself and letting your actions speak for themselves. By giving them space, working on yourself, and reconnecting on a positive note, you’ll not only make them miss you but also grow as a person in the process.
Remember, the goal isn’t just to make your ex miss you—it’s to create a life you’re proud of, with or without them. So, take these tips, put them into action, and watch as your ex starts to wonder what they’ve been missing.